Sally's Key West

Job Market 2009

Created by the creative people over at Screaming Frog Productions:

Good Sign

This is a huge LED sign belonging to Interstate AC Service in Nashville, TN. It overlooks I-40 westbound as it approaches downtown Nashville.

Florida Keys' Barbies

Mattel recently announced the release of limited-edition Barbie Dolls for the Florida Keys market:

Stock Island Barbie This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife,a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark and must be paid for in cash, preferably small, untraceable bills. Unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about.

Key Haven Barbie This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, Pier House Beach Club card and Key West Yacht Club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them!

Big Coppitt Barbie This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR t-shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.

Old Town Key West Barbie This collagen injected, rhino plastic Barbie wears a leopard print outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends on Duval St. Percocet prescription available as well as motel conversion condo.

Bay Point Barbie This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out of Stock Island Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through halter-top. Also available with a mobile home.

United Street Barbie This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, arch-less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow. She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two United Street Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free!

Big Pine Key Barbie She's perfect in every way, except she has no idea where Ken is because he's always out a-'huntin' key deer, rabbits, coons, and gators.

Duval Street Barbie/Ken This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or subtracting the multiple snap-on parts.

DISCLAIMER: Before you go gettin' all bent out of shape, I've been all these Barbie's. I am now unbelievably a perfect cross of United Street Barbie and Old Town Barbie with Bay Point Barbie's assets. Sans the mobile home.

A Citizen's Voice

“Nutcracker Key West needs to be revised to reflect modern values. The poor children forced to dress as soldiers and carry weapons of mass destruction should be re-costumed as a peace protest group of gay, lesbian, and trans-gender people who negotiate with the roosters instead of slaughtering them with swords! And the damage done to the reef by people walking on it?!”

And Now For Something Completely Different...

Monty Python brought us something completely different for four completely hilarious years, not to mention re-runs.

Then came the next generation of folks on Saturday Night Live, who brought us this something completely different... Funny, these days the subject of this video IS completely different. Sobering... I found this video link on my husband's blog.

If you have a credit card, if you have a home mortgage, even if you don't but you know anyone who has either:

 WATCH THIS VIDEO.

Starring Steve Martin...

Blathering Endlessly

I Will NEVER Miss Another Cramer:

My Friend Perry

My friend Perry and me, we go way back, almost 20 years. He's a used car salesman (I bought all my cars from him), 60-something, a redneck hillbilly from Tennessee and he talks lack it. Just lack I did before I moved from the foot of the Appalachian Mountains in KY to NYC, went to acting school and learnt how to talk normal. When I'm with Perry, my speech patterns... digress.

Like Dr. Phil and Ross Perot, Perry is always tossing off those funny old Southern truisms. Like the last time he was here in Costa Rica, a couple of months ago. He's been many times, but now he's lookin' to escape the rat race. He is encouraged by us having done it.

We were talking about Key West real estate, about a particular friend caught in the frenzy, and Perry said:

"He ain't lookin' for no cheese. He's jes lookin' to get out of the trap."

Smart guy.

VERY Funny

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